Moses apparently went up Mount Sinai alone and received the Ten Commandments from God. These are ten points for spiritual and moral living. Similar formats can be developed for other areas of the true warrior’s life.

Let’s consider what we might have on our list of ten commandments:

Number one: No mutual mystification1!

Just what is mutual mystification? Here is a business example:

Joe: “How did it go with XYZ?”

Mike: “It went well; they like us”

Joe: “That’s great!”

So what does Joe take away from this conversation? A warm, fuzzy feeling? Does Joe have any concrete knowledge of what the actual status is between the business that Mike represents and XYZ? Absolutely not! Is this acceptable? No! What can Joe do about it?

As a proponent of commandment number one, every time Joe hears words or phrases like, good, fine, great, progress, developing, couldn’t be better, etc, (all of those non-objective, subjective adjectives) he asks, what exactly does that mean? The usual response will be additional superlatives and an additional dose of high-level, mutual mystification. Joe requires clarity and objectivity though, so he asks for clarification. “I mean in terms of money or dates or specific next steps, or obligations? Who does what? When? Where? Why?”

Do not engage in mutual mystification. Do not offer it, and do not accept it. Guess what happens if we scrap the game of mutual mystification? We are party to true communication, and have a clear future! How refreshing!

We have talked about our human nature and our propensity to lie to ourselves. We are the great self-deceivers. We are overly optimistic and we want to feel good all the time.

Mutual mystification supports this natural desire. It is easy. It is simple. It is fast. It is comforting. Communicating next steps, milestones, responsibilities, commitments, obligations, time frames, and opportunities is hard work, and probably not very satisfying as we face the truth about the status quo at that moment. Not only that, it also identifies all that we have yet to accomplish … and that’s not as much fun as pretending we’re done … or nearly done.

You are warriors and you will not engage in mutual mystification! You will be objective and specific in your reporting so that everyone in your tribe knows and understands the current reality. You also know that sometimes, in external circumstances, offering banalities is appropriate, as we warriors have the power of discernment. So it is written.